Note: The article was created in collaboration with Dr. Jaclyn, a Licensed Mental Health Counselor with a Ph.D. in Counseling Studies and over ten years of experience working with a diverse clientele.
Summary
Ending therapy is a big decision but it doesn't have to be final. You can always come back or find a different provider that meets your needs. Here are the steps for ending your sessions safely and thoughtfully:
Be honest with your provider from the get-go.
Talk through your decision with friends and family.
Ask your provider how they feel you are progressing and meeting your goals.
Bring up termination to your therapist. Express what you've been thinking about
Make an exit plan with your therapist.
Ease into the final session. This may take a couple of sessions before a final termination appointment, usually involving an assessment.
A more detailed examination of these points is explored below.
Questions to Consider
Does feeling better mean you're done with therapy? A lot of people start feeling better after a few therapy sessions. Many will cancel appointments before going through a formal termination with their provider. While this is the right move for some, it is a good idea to get your therapist's perspective before making that choice.
How do you know when you're done? Knowing when you’re done with therapy is based on your personal goals and how much growth and progress you feel you've made. Your therapist can also provide their assessment and let you know if you are meeting the therapeutic goals you both made at the beginning of your counseling journey.
For example, from a therapeutic perspective, a client suffering from anxiety is done with counseling when they have reduced the number of times they feel anxious or have panic attacks during a week. They may feel they have an improved sense of their well-being sustained from week to week. They may be more mindful of negative patterns and use healthier tools to improve mood, reactions, and thoughts. They may feel more confident in their abilities and have a sense of security and self-trust.
Do you have to stop if you're feeling better? No. Some clients may want to reduce the number of times they see their therapist. They may switch to biweekly or monthly check-ins until they feel ready to say goodbye.
If you still want to see a therapist weekly, you could also explore different goals to focus on if you've met your original goals. Speak with your therapist about what you'd like to see and how you feel you're doing. When changing goals, it is important to remember that your current therapist may no longer be the best fit.
How to bring up termination
First, take time to process why you want to end this journey. Talk it out with friends or family first, then discuss it with your therapist during a session. Questions to consider during this evaluation include:
How am I functioning now?
Am I improving my functioning in my day-to-day routine?
Am I ready to move on?
Do I have any other goals I'd like to focus on?
Do I feel more complete?
Do I feel confident identifying when I need to use healthy coping skills?
If you're having trouble starting the conversation, you're not alone. It can be challenging to bring up. A helpful phrase to use is, "I'm starting to feel better. Can we talk about termination?" or "I feel like I'm meeting my goals and feel good about continuing to meet them outside therapy. What's your assessment?"
Even if you feel uncomfortable, a good therapist will not make you feel bad or guilty for wanting to end counseling. They will respect your decision and help guide you to the right decision. It's a good idea to have a few sessions before ending altogether.